Relationships 2.0 With Dr. Michelle Skeen
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Guest: Maria Felipe author of Live Your Happy: Get Out of Your Own Way And Find The Love Within
April 20, 2017 09:00 AM PDT
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Maria Felipe author of Live Your Happy: Get Out of Your Own Way and Find the Love Within
About the book:
Banish Fear, Encounter Love!
About the author:
Rev. Maria Felipe, a Cuban American born in Miami, found success as a model and actress before following a spiritual path that led her to study A Course in Miracles. She became an ordained minister at Pathways of Light and now leads monthly services in both Spanish and English at Unity Church in Burbank, California.Guest: Laura Doyle author of The Empowered Wife: Six Surprising Secrets for Attracting Your Husband's Time, Attention and Affection
April 13, 2017 09:00 AM PDT
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Laura Doyle author of The Empowered Wife: Six Surprising Secrets for Attracting Your Husband’s Time, Attention, and Affection
About the book:
Can a wife single-handedly bring a boring or broken marriage back to life? This improved and expanded edition of Laura Doyle’s acclaimed First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors features real-life success stories from empowered wives who have done just that–and provides a step-by-step guide to revitalizing your own marriage.
About the author:
Laura Doyle is a New York Times Best Selling Author of The Surrendered Wife, The Surrendered Single and First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors. Over 150,000 women credit her with helping them revitalize the intimacy in their relationships using the system in her Surrendered Wife, Empowered Woman Program for wives and girlfriends. To watch her free training program on how to become desired, cherished and adored for life, visit http://lauradoyle.org/
Laura has appeared on CBS Evening News, Dateline NBC, The Today Show and The View. She has been written about in The Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, The Washington Post, The London Telegraph and The New Yorker. She is a regular contributor to The Huffington Post and the founder of Laura Doyle Connect, a multi-national company that provides relationship coaching for single women, girlfriends and wives all over the world. Her books have been translated into 16 languages and published in 27 countries.Guest: Steven Stosny PhD author of Soar Above: How to Use the Most Profound Part of Your Brain Under Any Kind of Stress
March 30, 2017 08:00 AM PDT
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Steven Stosny PhD author of Soar Above: How to Use the Most Profound Part of Your Brain Under Any Kind of Stress
About the book:
About the author:
March 23, 2017 09:00 AM PDT
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Lisa Smartt author of Words at the Threshold: What We Say When We’re Nearing Death
About the book:
What Our Last Words Reveal About Life, Death, and the Afterlife
A person’s end-of-life words often take on an eerie significance, giving tantalizing clues about the ultimate fate of the human soul. Until now, however, no author has systematically studied end-of-life communication by using examples from ordinary people. When her father became terminally ill with cancer, author Lisa Smartt began transcribing his conversations and noticed that his personality underwent inexplicable changes. Smartt’s father, once a skeptical man with a secular worldview, developed a deeply spiritual outlook in his final days ― a change reflected in his language. Baffled and intrigued, Smartt began to investigate what other people have said while nearing death, collecting more than one hundred case studies through interviews and transcripts. In this groundbreaking and insightful book, Smartt shows how the language of the dying can point the way to a transcendent world beyond our own.
About the author:
Lisa Smartt, MA, is a linguist, educator, and poet. She is the author of Words at the Threshold: What We Say When We’re Nearing Death (New World Library 2017). The book is based on data collected through The Final Words Project, wwwfinalwordsproject.org, an ongoing study devoted to gathering and interpreting the mysterious language at end of life. She has worked closely with Raymond Moody, guided by his research into language, particularly unintelligible speech. They have co-facilitated presentations about language and consciousness at universities, hospices and conferences.Guest: Marc Allen to discuss Shakti Gawain's Creative Visualization: Use the Power of Your Imagination to Create What You Want in Your Life
March 16, 2017 09:00 AM PDT
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Marc Allen. Marc is joining me to discuss the 40th anniversary of Shakti Gawain’s book Creative Visualization: Use the Power of Your Imagination to Create What You Want in Your Life
About the book:
As introduced by Shakti Gawain to more than seven million readers worldwide, creative visualization is the art of using mental imagery and affirmation to produce positive changes in your life. Gawain’s clear writing style and vivid examples make Creative Visualization easy to read and apply to your personal needs and wants. This groundbreaking work has found enthusiastic followers in every country and language in which it has been published, and Gawain’s simple yet powerful techniques are now used successfully in many diverse fields, including health, education, business, sports, and the creative arts. Whether you read it for general inspiration and empowerment or to achieve specific goals (financial, creative, medical, career, relationship), Creative Visualization remains a profoundly powerful resource from a uniquely warm and wise teacher.
About my guest:
Marc Allen is an internationally renowned author and speaker, the president and publisher of New World Library, and an accomplished musician and composer.
March 09, 2017 09:00 AM PST
My radio show on Thursday March 9, 2017
About the show:
Gaslighting: Know it, Identify It and Protect Yourself
Gaslighting is a tactic in which a person or entity, in order to gain more power, makes a victim question their reality. It works much better than you may think. Anyone is susceptible to gaslighting, and it is a common technique of abusers, dictators, narcissists, and cult leaders. It is done slowly, so the victim doesn’t realize how much they’ve been brainwashed. For example, in the movie Gaslight (1944), a man manipulates his wife to the point where she thinks she is losing her mind.
People who gaslight typically use the following techniques:
2. They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof.
You know they said they would do something; you know you heard it. But they out and out deny it. It makes you start questioning your reality—maybe they never said that thing. And the more they do this, the more you question your reality and start accepting theirs.
3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition.
They know how important your kids are to you, and they know how important your identity is to you. So those may be one of the first things they attack. If you have kids, they tell you that you should not have had those children. They will tell you’d be a worthy person if only you didn’t have a long list of negative traits. They attack the foundation of your being.
4. They wear you down over time.
This is one of the insidious things about gaslighting—it is done gradually, over time. A lie here, a lie there, a snide comment every so often…and then it starts ramping up. Even the brightest, most self-aware people can be sucked into gaslighting—it is that effective. It’s the “frog in the frying pan” analogy: The heat is turned up slowly, so the frog never realizes what’s happening to it.
5. Their actions do not match their words.
When dealing with a person or entity that gaslights, look at what they are doing rather than what they are saying. What they are saying means nothing; it is just talk. What they are doing is the issue.
6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you.
This person or entity that is cutting you down, telling you that you don’t have value, is now praising you for something you did. This adds an additional sense of uneasiness. You think, “Well maybe they aren’t so bad.” Yes, they are. This is a calculated attempt to keep you off-kilter—and again, to question your reality. Also look at what you were praised for; it is probably something that served the gaslighter.
7. They know confusion weakens people.
Gaslighters know that people like having a sense of stability and normalcy. Their goal is to uproot this and make you constantly question everything. And humans’ natural tendency is to look to the person or entity that will help you feel more stable—and that happens to be the gaslighter.
8. They project.
They are a drug user or a cheater, yet they are constantly accusing you of that. This is done so often that you start trying to defend yourself, and are distracted from the gaslighter’s own behavior.
9. They try to align people against you.
Gaslighters are masters at manipulating and finding the people they know will stand by them no matter what—and they use these people against you. They will make comments such as, “This person knows that you’re not right,” or “This person knows you’re useless too.” Keep in mind it does not mean that these people actually said these things. A gaslighter is a constant liar. When the gaslighter uses this tactic it makes you feel like you don’t know who to trust or turn to—and that leads you right back to the gaslighter. And that’s exactly what they want: Isolation gives them more control.
10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.
This is one of the most effective tools of the gaslighter, because it’s dismissive. The gaslighter knows if they question your sanity, people will not believe you when you tell them the gaslighter is abusive or out-of-control. It’s a master technique.
11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.
By telling you that everyone else (your family, the media) is a liar, it again makes you question your reality. You’ve never known someone with the audacity to do this, so they must be telling the truth, right? No. It’s a manipulation technique. It makes people turn to the gaslighter for the “correct” information—which isn’t correct information at all.
The more you are aware of these techniques, the quicker you can identify them and avoid falling into the gaslighter’s trap.
Original Post on Psychology Today: Gaslighting: Know It and Identify It to Protect Yourself
About the author:
Dr. Stephanie Sarkis is a National Certified Counselor (NCC), Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC), and AMHCA Diplomate and Clinical Specialist in Child and Adolescent Counseling based in Tampa Bay, Florida, where she specializes in the treatment of ADD/ADHD. Dr. Sarkis conducts evaluations, testing, diagnosis, and counseling services. She also is a public speaker, consultant, coach, and is a facilitator in collaborative law.Guest: Evan M. Forman, PhD author of Effective Weight Loss: An Acceptance-Based Behavioral Approach
March 02, 2017 09:00 AM PST
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Evan M. Forman PhD author of Effective Weight Loss: An Acceptance-Based Behavioral Approach
About the book:
The obesity epidemic is one of the most serious public health threats confronting the nation and the world. The majority of overweight individuals want to lose weight, but the overall success of self-administered diets and commercial weight loss programs is very poor. Scientific findings suggest that the problem boils down to adherence. The dietary and physical activity recommendations that weight loss programs promote are effective; however, people have difficulty initiating and maintaining changes.
Effective Weight Loss presents 25 detailed sessions of an empirically supported, cognitive-behavioral treatment package called Acceptance-Based Behavioral Treatment (ABT). The foundation of this approach is comprised of the nutritional, physical activity, and behavioral components of the most successful, gold-standard behavioral weight loss programs. These components are synthesized with acceptance, willingness, behavioral commitment, motivation, and relapse prevention strategies drawn from a range of therapies. ABT is based on the idea that specialized self-control skills are necessary for weight control, given our innate desire to consume delicious foods and to conserve energy by avoiding physical activity. These self-control skills revolve around a willingness to choose behaviors that may be perceived as uncomfortable, for the sake of a more valuable objective. The Clinician Guide is geared towards helping administer treatment, and the companion Workbook provides summaries of session content, exercises, worksheets, handouts, and assignments for patients and clients receiving the treatment. The books will appeal to psychologists, primary care physicians, nutritionists, dieticians, and other clinicians who counsel the overweight.
About the author:
Evan Forman, PhD, is a Professor of Psychology at Drexel University and Co-Director of the Laboratory for Innovations in Health-Related Behavior Change. He also serves as Director of Graduate Studies and Chair of the Society for Clinical Psychology’s Committee on Science and Practice and is Past-President of the Philadelphia Behavior Therapy Association. He has been the lead investigator of several National Institute of Health-sponsored trials, including two comparing the effectiveness and processes of traditional cognitive therapy to newer acceptance-based behavior therapies. He also has been funded to examine the feasibility and effectiveness of smartphone and computerized neurocognitive training interventions for weight control.Guest: Evan M. Forman, PhD co-author of Mindfulness & Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders and Weight Concerns
February 23, 2017 09:00 AM PST
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Evan M. Forman PhD co-editor/author of Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders & Weight Concerns: Evidence-based Interventions
About the book:
Disordered eating, negative body image, and problems with weight have become an epidemic—and research shows that traditional treatments are not always effective. This professional resource offers proven-effective interventions using mindfulness and acceptance for treating clients with disordered eating, body image, or weight issues—and for whom other treatments have failed.
Millions of people in the United States suffer from eating disorders, and dissatisfaction with weight and body type—even in individuals whose weight is considered normal—is similarly widespread. In addition, more than half of Americans could benefit from healthy weight loss. Unfortunately, not all people with eating disorders or weight concerns respond to traditional therapeutic interventions; many continue to suffer significant symptoms even after treatment. What these clients need is an integrated therapeutic approach that will prove effective in the long run—like the scientifically backed methods in this much-needed clinical guide.
Edited by Ann F. Haynos, Jason Lillis, Evan M. Forman, and Meghan L. Butryn; and with contributors including Kay Segal, Debra Safer, and Hugo Alberts; Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders and Weight Concerns is the first professional resource to incorporate a variety of proven-effective acceptance- and mindfulness-based approaches—such as acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT)—into the treatment of persistent disordered eating, body image issues, and weight problems.
With these evidence-based interventions, you’ll be ready to help your clients move beyond their problems with disordered eating, body dissatisfaction, and weight management once and for all.
About the editor/author:
February 16, 2017 09:00 AM PST
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guests are W. Brad Johnson, PhD & David Smith, PhD authors of Athena Rising: How and Why Men Should Mentor Women
About the book:
Increasingly, new employees and junior members of any profession are encouraged-sometimes stridently-to “find a mentor!” Four decades of research reveals that the effects of mentorship can be profound and enduring; strong mentoring relationships have the capacity to transform individuals and entire organizations. Organizations that retain and promote top talent-both female and male-are more likely to thrive. But the mentoring landscape is unequal. Evidence consistently shows that women face more barriers in securing mentorships than men, and when they do find a mentor, they may reap a narrower range of both career and psychological benefits. Athena Rising is a book for men about how to mentor women deliberately and effectively. It is a straightforward, no-nonsense manual for helping men of all institutions, organizations, and businesses to become excellent mentors to women. Co-authors W. Brad Johnson, PhD and David Smith, PhD draw from extensive research and years of experience as experts in mentoring relationships and gender workplace issues. When a man mentors a woman, they explain, the relationship is often complicated by conventional gender roles and at times hostile external perceptions. Traditional notions of mentoring are often modeled on male-to-male relationships-the sort that begin on the golf course, involve a nearly exclusive focus on career achievement, and include more than a few slaps on the back over drinks after work. But women often report a desire for mentoring that integrates career and interpersonal needs. Women want a mentor who not only “gets” this, but truly honors it. Men need to fully appreciate just how crucial their support of promising junior women can be in helping them to persist, promote, and thrive in their vocations and organizations. As women succeed, lean in, and assume leading roles in any organization or work context, that culture will become more egalitarian, effective, and prone to retaining top talent.
About the authors:
W. Brad Johnson, PhD is professor of psychology in the Department of Leadership, Ethics, and Law at the United States Naval Academy, and a faculty associate in the Graduate School of Education at Johns Hopkins University. A clinical psychologist and former Lieutenant Commander in the Navy’s Medical Service Corps, Dr. Johnson served as a psychologist at Bethesda Naval Hospital and the Medical Clinic at Pearl Harbor where he was the division head for psychology. He is a fellow of the American Psychological Association and recipient of the Johns Hopkins University Teaching Excellence Award. He has served as chair of the American Psychological Association’s Ethics Committee and as president of the Society for Military Psychology. Dr. Johnson is the author of more than 100 journal articles and book chapters—many on the topic of mentoring—and 12 books, in the areas of mentoring, professional ethics, and counseling. Books of related interest include: On Being a Mentor: A Guide for Higher Education Faculty (2nd Ed.) (2015), The Elements of Mentoring (Revised Ed.) (2008, with Charles Ridley), The Elements of Ethics for Professionals (2008, with Charles Ridley), and Becoming a Leader the Annapolis Way (2006, with Greg Harper).
Guest: Jeremy Cage author of All Dreams on Deck: Charting the Course for Your Life and Work
February 09, 2017 09:00 AM PST
This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Jeremy Cage author of All Dreams on Deck: Charting the Course for Your Life and Work
About the book:
Set sail for the adventure of your life and work!
As Katie Couric, journalist, author and Yahoo Global News Anchor attests, ”Jeremy Cage has written a great book that everyone who thinks about how to better balance work-life issues would benefit from reading….he’s also shown us how to better navigate life’s personal and professional challenges.”
All Dreams on Deck will help you articulate your most important dreams in work and life and will then give you a practical approach for realizing those dreams. Through engaging, real-life examples, you will be inspired to live life to your full potential.
Author Jeremy Cage, President of the Cage Group, begins with the premise that there is no such thing as work-life balance. There is only life balance–of which work is an important part. With this as the foundation, he will guide you through a simple and actionable approach to determining the most important components of your life–the Grab Bags in your LifeBoat–then chart the course to making all the dreams in that LifeBoat a reality.
Jeremy, who has lived and worked in nine countries, has used this approach to help thousands of executives, managers, and their teams unleash their potential. He has also realized his own dreams by taking a sixteen-month sabbatical to sail around the world with his family before returning to the US to launch several exciting new companies. So rather than theoretical mumbo jumbo, Jeremy presents compelling, real-life examples of how to dream specifically, get highly intentional about those dreams, plan and prepare well–then summon the courage to set sail.
About the author:
Jeremy Cage’s life mission is to help unleash the full potential of as many businesses and as many people as he possibly can. His business experience spans three decades of delivering strong, profitable business growth for Procter & Gamble, Schering-Plough Healthcare, PepsiCo, The Lighting Science Group, and his own firm, The Cage Group. He is a truly global citizen, having lived and worked in Germany, France, Belgium, Sweden, the United Kingdom, Venezuela, Brazil, Mexico, and the United States.
Jeremy believes that most businesses and most people regardless of how successful they have been to date do not actually achieve their full potential ”as defined by them.” Committed to not letting that happen in his own life, he embarked on a sixteen-month voyage to sail the world, with his wife, Pat, and their kids, Bradley and Elena. This stretched his leadership skills, built his courage, pushed him beyond his comfort zone, and stimulated his creativity through interactions with new cultures and people.
Jeremy’s unique combination of business adventures and life adventures forms the foundation of the tools he uses to create breakthrough strategy, marketing, innovation, and people solutions for a diverse range of Fortune 500 companies.
Relationships 2.0 airs live on Thursday mornings 8:00amPT/11:00amET. I interview guests who present their unique perspectives and expertise on topics that cover all aspects of relationships. The authors and experts I chat with offer advice and tips for understanding ourselves and others better. To find out more go to www.michelleskeen.com
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